Court's Nonsense

Aug 30

2014 so far

thesmashbro:

fabuloushetahungary:

toroheicho:

omidtheamnesiacender:

punished-gagsy:

anguisant:

the-internet-addict:

smallvagina:

kawaiiibatman:

smallvagina:

January: Selfie Olympics

February: Flappy Bird

lets see how the rest of the year goes

March: No Oscar for Leonardo DeCaprio

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April: it’s a metaphors, you’re a metaphors, we are a metaphor, if I see another metaphor I’m going to kill someone

May:

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June:

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Wonder how July is gonna be

i will keep reblogging this each month

July:

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August

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Aug 24

southpauz:

True story.

When I was in 7th Grade, I almost set an Elementary School on fire while trying to microwave a cookie.

I was working at the concessions stand during a basketball tournament (my team was required to work because the tournament was being hosted in my School district), and, because I was hungry, I decided to use the microwave to heat up my cookie. My teeth were very sore due to me getting dental braces that week, so I decided to microwave it for a minute so it could be really soft.

It set on fire. 

The smoke alarm went off throughout the school.

The sprinkler system went off.

Basketball games that were going on at the time were cancelled.

Everyone had to evacuate the school and wait for the Police and Fire Department to show up. 

I JUST WANTED A COOKIE.

Aug 24
Aug 23

pizza-queen:

I just realized the phrase 'stay golden' could be interpreted a whole different way for lesbians if you catch my drift….. if not here’s why.

Aug 19

"College as explained to me in high school" vs. "College as experienced firsthand"

  • In high school they told us: There will be no grades in a class except the midterm and the final, so you have to study hard because failing one test means you fail the class.
  • Once I was in college a professor said: Hey, you guys are working really hard on your third paper, so I'm just going to cancel the final and give everyone a hundred on it.
  • In high school they told us: In college, class always begins exactly at the scheduled start time. If your class is at 9 AM and you get there at 9:01, the doors will be locked and you'll be out of luck, especially if it's the day of the midterm or final, because then you get a zero.
  • Once I was in college a professor said: Does anyone mind if I start class at 3:35 instead of 3:30? These elevators are really slow and I want to have time for a cigarette before I teach for 90 minutes.
  • In high school they told us: Every class you miss drops you a full letter grade in college courses.
  • Once I was in college almost every professor said: You can miss three classes without a penalty, and a few more if you have a Doctor's note. Sorry to be a hardass, but you automatically fail if you miss more than ten days of class.
  • In high school they told us: If you do have papers, your professors just lecture and put the assignments on the syllabus. You're completely responsible for remembering the deadlines, they won't remind you. All your professors will do is lecture and the rest is up to you.
  • Once I was in college a professor said: Okay, so your next paper is in two weeks! I'll keep reminding you in the interim, but I just want to make sure you have enough time to do it! Let's run through the structure I want to see real quick, and if you have any questions, feel free to email me or come to my office hours!
  • In high school they told us: You have to use MLA formatting and if you make any mistakes in your citations, it'll be considered plagiarism. You'll be expelled and probably sued.
  • Once I was in college almost every professor said: Please do not use MLA, it is awful, we use either APA or Chicago here because we are not 14 years old.
Aug 19

thebacksideofthewall:

I swear the fuckin producers of the simpsons knew shit was an issue before anyone opened their eyes.

Aug 12

benjenstark:

doubleyootoo:

benjenstark:

i wanna make a fighting game with females of all body types and then maybe like three male characters but theyre super hunky and jacked and the only difference between them is their outfit and hair colour… hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm….

would the men be dressed really impractically?

bondage speedos and see through tops. only

Jul 29

shaman-music:

unsuccessfulmetalbenders:

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DAPHNE WHO THE FUCK U THINK U FOOLIN 

fred gonna tear it up in the basement

Jul 29

neptunain:

heteronormativity is so weird like yesterday I was at my aunts beach house and some of her in-laws brought over this small baby. and the baby puts it’s hand on it’s brow to keep the sun out of it’s eyes and his father says “look at that! Leon is looking for girls!” Leon is eight months old I don’t think he knows what a girl is yet

Jul 29
raisingbabys:

leety1992:

motherof-dragonns:

gemmaisagem:

shewalkslikethunder:

bird0fhermes:

I’m crying oh my fucking god

"I’m just trying to get through this." bless this woman

Oh lord… I have 3 boys. Is this what’s in store for me 😩

THIS IS WHY I CAN’T HANDLE THREE BOYS!


😳 if we have two of the same sex we are trying for a third. This post changed my mind. If we have two girls we can try for a third. If we have two boys I’m done.

Omg lmao

raisingbabys:

leety1992:

motherof-dragonns:

gemmaisagem:

shewalkslikethunder:

bird0fhermes:

I’m crying oh my fucking god

"I’m just trying to get through this." bless this woman

Oh lord… I have 3 boys. Is this what’s in store for me 😩

THIS IS WHY I CAN’T HANDLE THREE BOYS!

😳 if we have two of the same sex we are trying for a third.
This post changed my mind. If we have two girls we can try for a third.
If we have two boys I’m done.

Omg lmao